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What are you doing right now?

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Just bought myself this little box of fun!

Picking my nose while typing this.

Beer + Insane Goa!! - - Love you all

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I just finished school. A mere 8 years after starting. Soon I will be the proud owner of one shiny new Bachelors degree in Electronic Engineering Technology.


What now?


Awesome! Congratulations! I hope you have decent employment and living arrangements for the time being. I graduated in January 2013 with a Bachelors degree in Computer Science and it was extremely hard for me to figure out what to do next. I knew I did not want to move back in with my parents, so I had to find employment as soon as possible to pay the rent. I took crappy jobs for about 2 years before finally taking the plunge and just quitting to find better work more suited to what I am capable of. That was the hardest 4 months of my life back in late 2014.


I wish you luck!

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  • 3 weeks later...

I'm burning my paid holidays before I lose them. Three weeks with nothing really planned. Just some family time in what is definitely Japan's best season!!


Went to the beach yesterday for the first time in almost a year. That was great. I love the beach.

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Hey! How are you all!It's been quite some time! Hope you're doing great!


Pretty good here.

How are you doing?

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On a mission to kill my annoying neighbours with Goa!


Started at 9 a.m :P with Time Paradox, now onto EU - One Love. And shit is loud. :lol: thank god, for once I'm unable to hear their thousand voices.


Bwah ha ha! I have Psykovsky lined up ( may be sharp at 12. Deadly with the insane heat ) just so you guys know, Electronica doesn't exist over here, it's a village :P they might think I'm a freak (I guess they already do :lol:)


Enjoy your weekend peeps.

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im depressed.

my economic life is crumbling all around me.

xanax and weed and alcohol dont even help so i stay away. but nothing can cure this anxiety cause its not caused by thoughts in my head, its very real situation..

pray for me or whatever...

going thru the absolute roughest time of my life and im in very really at the end of the road and there can only happen two things.


catastrophe or miracle. ive burned all my bridges.




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^ What's the cause?

its really too complicated to list..

but the problem is im only 50% to blame but i suffer the full 100%

and bills are piling up, collection agencies bills are piling up - its not looking good.

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all it took was about 500 euro a friend borrowed and didnt return

that slowly caused a downward spiral that im now very much feeling the effects from.

income too low and it piles up and becomes more and more.

but even with added costs, interest and stuff, even 500 euro now would like, basically solve it.

and i get 500 euro in tax returns but thats not until a little over a month from now and every day now is survival mode, strictly.


and thats about it for the acute situation..

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I've been in survival mode before. It can be terrifying and it never helps to gear that your still better of than 90% of the world. All I can say is that in the big picture 500 euros isn't enough to stress about.

Money is tight now, I lived for a year on cup noodles and water. Not healthy at all and I was convinced it'd be the death of me but I got a job and was grateful for it worked hard and was given more money. Now I can by 5 euro wine and bags of cheese strings. Living the dream.

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+1 to what Abasio said, I have lived off of bread + groundnut powder & instant noodles (cheaper than cup noodles) for a good 6 + months. When I look back, I simply adore that time, it taught me so many things, it taught me the value of food, (I don't even waste a single rice grain now) value of true relations, how world works and shit.


You are lucky that it's only economic hardship, combine that with social evils of discrimination and shit, that's the worst.


Hang in there. And do quit it while you can (sorry had to say, I consider it my duty)

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todays survival mode included:

pawnshop: router, sound card, watch. for a total of 100+ euro.


so i spent some i some alcohol and cannabis ofc to escape the living nightmare,

which is why im even able to communicate anything today.

i know, i dont need any moral coments, any lecturing, im a grown man, i know when and why i make mistakes.


thats one thing.

the other thing, even if i didnt spend these puny money on the drugs, it wouldnt have helped in any way shape or form in any other way, more so than food for another day.

but tbh, the way things are going, food is no longer prio 1 . survival mode is completely different for every individual but its the same instinct.



and thats what im doing .


edit: and mind you, if you are thinking im begging you are severely mistaken. firstly i do not accept handouts, secondly im not that low and depsereate to beg on a forum.

im just sharing my thoughts and thats all. i dont care what you believe but thats the truth. so i sware to god.

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Eating. Drinking. Unfortunately smelling the disgusting perfume of some nearby people.


I spent all day trying to get a TI microcontroller IDE up and running and start figuring out how to use it. My brain hurts.

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There's different ways of surviving. Sometimes you have to do what you can to mentally survive. But like most of the things we do to make it through the day, continuing the same thing for a long time just makes it harder to survive later on. Every day for me is the day before I give the booze a rest. I'll just drink tonight and tomorrow I'll have none. Doesn't work out how I plan though.
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