The intro needs rework, poor eq (altough that dark texture may be the intended result, it sounds hidden, withouth presence, a bit muddy), altough the fact that it is melodic gets extra points.
That tye of constant repetitive non-dynamic bassline wrecks the music, why not use velocity? sidechain? And the bass is too loud in comparison to the rest of the mix (maybe this is the intended, personally it sounds too much (was this track made on headphones? or were a proper monitoring system used?)
The kick is not bad
0:33 > The voices are unclear, unperceptible, confused (again poor eq, bad mix, you can use a stereo imager to improve audibility quality, for example).
0:49 > this swirling fx is interesting, but can be better using sidechain or volume shapping or a gate to improve the dynamic of the sound and give more life to it, it is a bit raw. At 0:53 that fx just tramples the music and almost kills it, you could make a mini-break and let that sound speak freely instead without conflicts with the rest of the elements.
0:56 those introduced open hihats seem dead, without body, it seems you filtered everything else to leave just the highs, where are the mids?! Percussive sounds can improve most of the time with an transient shaper to give punch.
0:56 nice percussion sounds (tablas?), well they certainly fit well, good choice
You may not be aware of the fact that it is necessary to create space for the kick and bass breath properly. For that reason, that 1:41 fx has too much bass, conflicting with the kick and bass (use Eq).
2:05 good arppegio synth intro,
2:45 it´s clearly a sort of break, but you can do much better than using repetitive kicks
2:51 good melodic play
2:52 why so many crashes? It sounds like a marching band usually they are used spaced every 16 bars, to denote a new section. Instead of abusing them, be Creative, employ different sounds, maybe another type of fX?
3:02 what tha heck is this sound? what is it´s contribution to the song? remember, what is the contribution of this sound to the listeners perpective? It´s a pointless sound. It seems almost melodic, but it is so badly eq that it is not helping in any manner, improve it or remove it.
3:30 Wow the lion has awakened, good stuff
3:35 you have to check that filter automation better, maybe too much resonance? try without any, just play with the cutoff, or maybe it is the type of filtering, test Low Pass filter.
3:38 that acidic sound is cool, the onbeat hats are distinct but... the bass is terrible. Now, instead of a too much bass in comparison to the first minutes, this one is so poorly positioned that it does not sound like bass anymore, lack of bass frequencies, it sounds like it is playing in an higher octave than the rest of the basses, like a typical synth.
4:06 that fx is ridiculous (that thing that seems like someone beating its own cheeck), you certainly can do better than that, again, improve it or remove it.
4:18 ok, a more elaborated minibreak, nice accompayning fx
5:03 Ok, it is the main break, but why not doing this more at the middle of the song? To give a more sophisticated type of arrangement?
Like the intro, the ending can also be improved, not so abruptly.
Overall you have a song from beginning to start and that is a fact. You seem to use too much innapropriate fx's, by this I mean that many sounds seem to be thrown just for the purpose of being there for no reason at all but to fill in the blanks, you could be more selective.
There is a general lack of Dynamics and Widht (more compression, stereo imagers, transient shapers). Curiously the overall mix does not sound too bad, I assume it is not an yet mastered track.
Sound design is an issue here, dwelve deeper into synthesis, it requires a lot of effort but it is worth it. Altough there are some synths that have the potential to be even better.
You have a sense of rhythm, and some interesting parts are present.
Play more with veocities, experiment swing and triplets.
I have recently discovered this site, it might help: http://daniellesden.com/advice
Please, understand that these comments are just a point of view, it´s your song!